for whatever reason i am attracted to these largely EXPLOITATIVE ALTERNATIVE ROCK BIOGRAPHIES published by ST. MARTIN'S GRIFFIN in the mid-to-late 1990s.  bands like SOUNDGARDEN, NIRVANA and the like.  what i find INTRIGUING about them is that you get a somewhat CONTEMPORANEOUS sense of their PERSONAL NARRATIVE and ARTISTIC TRAJECTORY, not a RETROSPECTIVE ACCOUNT filtered through the HAZY and often INACCURATE GAUZE of TIME and INEVITABLE critical DISAPPOINTMENT.  these books were written and published in short order with the TIME-SENSITIVE OBJECTIVE of taking advantage of their SUBJECT's POPULARITY at its RELATIVE peak.

for MARTIN HUXLEY's unimaginatively titled NINE INCH NAILS (ST. MARTIN'S GRIFFIN, 1997) BIOGRAPHY of TRENT REZNOR, what comes across is the COMPELLING PORTRAIT of a VISIONARY and deeply AMBITIOUS and INNOVATIVE SONGWRITER who attempts to find CATHARSIS in his CRAFT but ends up amassing INNER-CONFLICT and TURMOIL in the process.  born and raised in RURAL WESTERN PENNSYLVANIA, the PERSONAL NARRATIVE of REZNOR is one defined by BOREDOM.   for some the countryside is a PASTORAL IDYLL of TRANQUILITY that promotes a ROOTED BALANCE with NATURE.  for REZNOR there is a RESTLESS QUALITY that came with being out of reach of MAINSTREAM CULTURE.  its not surprising that he left college early to pursue MUSIC and life in a bigger city, of which he chose NEARBY CLEVELAND.  there he found a SMALL but FRACTURED and INTERNECINE COMMUNITY of MUSICIANS, many of which were STRUGGLING by playing bars in cover bands and the like.  its not like OHIO was a CULTURAL NEXUS on par with LOS ANGELES or NEW YORK CITY, but the ISOLATION worked in his favor as he was able to find work as an ASSISTANT in a STUDIO and basically work for RECORDING TIME while subsisting on BASIC NUTRITION.

the BOOK deconstructs the PERSONA of REZNOR as this MYSTERIOUS and UNDERGROUND AVENGING ANGEL of INDUSTRIAL MUSIC and all things ALTERNATIVE, instead rooting his success in his SONGWRITING GIFTS, CREATIVITY and PRETERNATURAL ABILITY to dissect and RECONSTITUTE a version of himself on wax.  i tend to agree with that ASSESSMENT since what separated his MUSIC from PREDECESSORS in DEPECHE MODE, KMFDM, SKINNY PUPPY, MINISTRY and so on was the INTERIOR NATURE of his LYRICS.  those SLASHING DISSONANT GUITARS, ARPEGGIATED ELECTRONIC KEYBOARD RUNS and PROGRAMMED POLYRHYTHMS were but an INGENIOUS SOUNDSCAPE to buttress LYRICS that entirely exposed his INSECURITIES and deep-seated EMOTIONAL VULNERABILITIES.  somehow these UNCONVENTIONAL mechanized and INORGANIC AURAL ELEMENTS made these INTIMATE ADMISSIONS hit that much HARDER.  over time when finding some semblance of footing as an EFFECTIVE LIVE DRAW, especially in HIGH PROFILE TOURS / GIGS like LOLLAPALOOZA, WOODSTOCK 94 and an opening slot for DAVID BOWIE, REZNOR adroitly understood how his PUBLIC PERSONA had shifted. 

and for me that RELATIONSHIP between him and his PERSONA is the real crux of his CAREER circa THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL (INTERSCOPE, 1994) ERA and beyond.  witnessing and being culpable in your own PUBLIC PERSONA becoming a wildly DISTORTED CARICATURE of yourself.  the BOOK ends during this CONSEQUENTIAL PERIOD and hints at FUTURE PROJECTS.  of course we all know about the EXTENDED SABBATICAL REZNOR took thereafter to get a grip on himself, his CAREER and his life.  these early BELOVED YEARS of his CAREER provided his fans with an EFFECTIVE SOUNDTRACK to exorcise PAST TRAUMA and PAIN, but at the expense of his MENTAL HEALTH.  i appreciate that REZNOR had the FRAME-OF-MIND to look after and consolidate himself and return all the STRONGER YEARS later with a match DEEP FOCUS and MOTIVATION to create MEANINGFUL ART, albeit from a PERSPECTIVE that doesnt feed off SELF-LOATHING and SELF-DEFEATING IMPULSES.  for his sake and that of his FANS.

NINE INCH NAILS is a perfectly PEDESTRIAN quick read with some INTERESTING TIDBITS thrown in enough to satiate COMPLETISTS and REZNOR FANATICS.  im sure once REZNOR gets around to writing an AUTOBIOGRAPHY or participating in a SANCTIONED BIOGRAPHY that a more COMPLETE PICTURE will flesh out his PAST CHOICES.  until then this INESSENTIAL BOOK will somewhat suffice.  NOT TERRIBLE, but NOT GROUNDBREAKING either.  only HARDCORE FANS need apply.

parody by nacrowe

check out HERE this recent streaming video episode of DEER GOD RADIO  celebrating the EXPERIMENTAL HIP HOP group DEATH GRIPS!
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just gonna start with the OBVIOUS here. 

CHINO MORENO is a singularly TRANSCENDENT FRONTMAN who basically positioned himself as the ESSENTIAL link in the CULTURAL CHAIN, along with his much REVERED IDOL and direct antecedent MIKE PATTON (FAITH NO MORE, MR. BUNGLE), connecting EMOTIVE POST-PUNK SINGERS like MORRISSEY (THE SMITHS), IAN MCCULLOCH (ECHO & THE BUNNYMEN), PETERY MURPHY (BAUHAUS), ROBERT SMITH (THE CURE) and IAN CURTIS (JOY DIVISION) to MODERN highly EXPERIMENTAL POST-HARDCORE SINGERS such as DARYL PALUMBO (GLASSJAW), ANTHONY GREEN (CIRCA SURVIVE, SAOSIN) and CEDRIC BIXLER-ZAVALA (AT THE DRIVE-IN, MARS VOLTA).  MORENO of course is RENOWNED for his work with the ICONIC SACRAMENTO ALTERNATIVE ROCK outfit DEFTONES, but in recent years has sought out side-projects that have extended his SONIC PALETTE, including the POST METAL band PALMS (with BRYANT CLIFFORD MEYER, AARON HARRIS and JEFF CAXIDE of ISIS), the SHOEGAZE / TRIP HOP outfit TEAM SLEEP and the decidedly INDUSTRIAL / DARK WAVE ELECTRONIC ​duo ††† (CROSSES).

the beauty of a GENERATIONAL TALENT such as MORENO, (again, like PATTON) is that he can excel in any genre situation he finds himself in, and his listening habits reflect a wide breadth of such GENUINE APPRECIATION.

at first glance CROSSES may come across as a CURIOUS creative decision but fans of MORENO are well aware of his ADMIRATION for early SYNTH POP bands like DEPECHE MODE and later DREAM POP acts like the COCTEAU TWINS.  both of these INFLUENTIAL bands utilized the EXPANDED palette of ELECTRONIC TEXTURES to create AMBIENT and MELANCHOLIC soundscapes that seemed to evoke a heightened EMOTIVE plane.  such seems to be the ARTISTIC ETHOS of CROSSES, if any.

now MORENO is a known entity, but his LOCAL SACRAMENTO BANDMATE SHAUN LOPEZ of INFLUENTIAL POST-HARDCORE outfit FAR is a bit of a HIDDEN GEM.  dude is the main COMPOSER and MULTI-INSTRUMENTALIST that on three EPs and two full-lengths has created an IMMERSIVE world of sound that is as MOROSE and DESOLATE as it is SEXY and INVITING.  it is basically the seemingly PERFECT sonic counterpoint for the most commercially VISIBLE non-DEFTONES project his FAMOUS BANDMATE has been identified with.  has LEGENDARY and universally REVERED as MORENO's main gig is, CROSSES lives up more than favorably to the EXPECTED and INEVITABLE comparisons.  if anything, this venture for over a decade is more SLEEK and consciously MODERN in its APPROACH as well as PRESENTATION, and undoubtedly much of this is due to the OVERFLOWING CREATIVITY of LOPEZ in this context.

definitely worth checking out.  no doubt.  this band is absolutely SICK.

it was a FORTUNATE accident when we came across the VIRGINIA INDUSTRIAL BLUES band BUCK GOOTER while filming on location at MARKET HOTEL in BROOKLYN a few years ago for our live performance video series ON THE M (linked HERE).  the set consisted of these NASTY, BOTTOMLESS DIRGES played as if they were conducted by EVIL robots.  frontman BILLY BRETT was swaying around and whipping chains while guitarist TERRY TURTLE was standing SENTINEL over the audience in MEDIEVAL CHAINMAIL.  they just looked and sounded completely POSSESSED, like a SOUNDTRACK to the APOCALYPSE.  i just remember thinking immediately that this band was COOL, like the first time i came across BIG BLACK.  mind blown.

unfortunately we werent able to use the footage due to an issue with the audio we took from the soundboard that night, but we were all PSYCHED to see it utilized later in their "NAILED TO A CROSS" video.  

the band itself was beyond PROLIFIC with 19 records over their 15+ year career at the time.  sadly TURTLE passed away from cancer in 2019 at age 67.  BRETT has carried on and we wish BUCK GOOTER nothing but the best.  their most recent release GHOST BRAIN (2023), produced by OLIVER ACKERMANN (A PLAE TO BURY STRANGERS), is absolutely DEMENTED and well worth checking out. 

RIP TERRY TURTLE

MECHANICAL ANIMALS (INTERSCOPE, 1998), the much ANTICIPATED MICHAEL BEINHORN [SOUNDGARDEN, HOLE, RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS] produced follow-up to the TRANSGRESSIVE cultural phenomena that was the INDUSTRIAL-tinged, MIDDLE AMERICA-baiting ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR (INTERSCOPE, 1996) was a DRAMATIC stylistic about-face that saw MARILYN MANSON channel his sense of ISOLATION and DETACHMENT from AMERICAN SOCIETY through the prism of 1970s GLAM ROCK and specifically ZIGGY STARDUST / ALADDIN SANE-era DAVID BOWIE.  in the scope of his discography, this album very much stands out as an outlier, both in terms of SONICS and PRESENTATION, and represents MANSON at both his most CONTEMPLATIVE and most POTENT as an artist.  it is also my FAVORITE record of his bar none.

this album came out my freshman year of high school.  i was at a PRESTIGIOUS boarding school in NEW ENGLAND while the rest of my family stayed behind in NIGERIA.  i dont want to say being that far from family was a TRAUMATIC event at such a young, barely in my teens, but it was a TRANSFORMATIVE experience that resonated down through the ensuing decades no doubt.  in a sense i had to become my own support system as the place was rather BRUTAL with BARBARIC HAZING RITUALS involving underclassmen the staff turned a blind eye towards.  to say i felt frustrated, targeted and alone is an understatement.  i was the perfect receptor for such a message being transmitted by this JADED, SEXLESS,  HUMANOID alien character that MANSON was now inhabiting.  for him the prison he was attempting to escape with INTERSTELLAR ambitions was that of a pre-internet tabloid culture and UNREALISTIC press / audience expectations to out-SATAN ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR.  for me that prison was quite LITERAL.  it was the prison of going through puberty and your most physically AWKWARD phase while being a part of an UNHEALTHY community that i found particularly hazardous to my physical and emotional well-being.  in my defense this posture and mindset was well warranted, as that same school year another freshman was assaulted at nearby dormitory and had an ANTI-GAY SLUR carved into his back by a post-graduate student who went on to serve an extended sentence for an assortment of ASSAULT and BATTERY CHARGES.  i feel lucky to have survived such an experience with my self-will and self-worth intact, and MECHANICAL ANIMALS was very much the soundtrack to such.

and that harsh sense of SELF-LOATHING and DETACHMENT is all over.  especially tracks such as "THE SPEED OF PAIN," "COMA WHITE," "MECHANICAL ANIMALS," "DISASSOCIATIVE" and "GREAT BIG WHITE WORLD."  for me those particular tracks serve as the EMOTIONAL heart of the record, exposing a PROFOUND sense of PSYCHIC WITHDRAWAL from life itself.  that need to just turn off the blinds, shut the door and block out the world.  the more UPTEMPO songs like "POSTHUMAN," "ROCK IS DEAD," "NEW MODEL NO. 15" and the single "THE DOPE SHOW" all seem designed to potentially gain airplay while delivering a DEVIOUS message both celebrating and disparaging CELEBRITY CULTURE and the state of ROCK N ROLL writ large.  as much as i love the TWIGGY RAMIREZ-conceived SLINKY BASS LINES and ADROIT SONIC EXPERIMENTATIONS with vintage synthesizers, those more HARD-CHARGING tracks are weaker in my opinion.  same with the embarrassingly INANE "I DON'T LIKE THE DRUGS BUT THE DRUGS LIKE ME" single which is the lone mistake on the album.  for me, those more NUANCED, SOMBER moments are what make this record special, much like "CRYPTORCHID," "MAN THAT YOU FEAR" and "KINDERFELD" did on ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR.

post-MECHANICAL ANIMALS, MANSON largely retreated to the more EXPECTED, SAFE GOTH confines of INDUSTRIAL METAL with a slew of records to date that largely retread on the ideas crystallized in ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR.  which in my opinion was an artistic mistake, but i am sure it gave him more career longevity.  that is more future OZZY OSBOURNE, ROB ZOMBIE, SLAYER, ALICE COOPER co-headlining package tour opportunities that are subject to satiating and drawing out his audience en masse over time.  such PRACTICAL, CALCULATING decisions make him subject to not being at the same artistic level as a DAVID BOWIE, BJORK, SUN RA, DAMON ALBARN or a GEORGE CLINTON, all of whom charged ahead with IDIOSYNCRATIC personas that assisted in unlocking a new sound and/or inhabit a new consciousness.  the rest of MANSON's DISAPPOINTING career is just one of a series of expected artistic choices with ever PREDICTABLE diminishing returns. 

but MECHANICAL ANIMALS is a definite highlight of the 1990s ALTERNATIVE ROCK era that is well worth revisiting and checking out again and again.

i hate SACRAMENTO with a PASSION.

i spent my senior year of high school living with a relative in a WHITE-BREAD suburb of the state capital in the wake of 9/11 and was just appalled at the IN-YOUR-FACE JINGOISM, RACISM and just NAKED IDIOCY on full daily display.  and that aftertaste very much still lingers.  at the time, i kept thinking that nothing of CULTURAL VALUE has come from the area with the lone exception being the SEMINAL ALTERNATIVE METAL band DEFTONES.  over the past two decades that list has been amended a bit with INNOVATIVE and IMPACTFUL acts such as HELLA, CHELSEA WOLFE, TERA MELOS and DEATH GRIPS.

when i first came across the debut mixtape EX MILITARY (THIRD WORLDS, 2011) by EXPERIMENTAL HIP HOP act DEATH GRIPS i was completely emotionally sideswiped.  it didnt process.  it was like this ABSURD hybrid of the highly MANIPULATED, IMAGINATIVE FOUND SOUND-enabled UNPREDICTABILITY of APHEX TWIN, the OBLITERATING sonic BRUTALITY of CONVERGE and the CONFRONTATIONAL, NO-BULLSHIT, STREETWISE LYRICISM of the WU-TANG CLAN.  these component parts should not exist together, and yet they do and the sound is CHAOTIC and BEAUTIFUL in its TECHNICAL WIZARDRY, COMPOSITIONAL COMPLEXITY and EMOTIONAL RELEASE.  EX MILITARY was easily one of the most ADVENTUROUS releases i had heard in decades.  the whole VISUAL and AURAL AESTHETIC of DEATH GRIPS is absolute uncertainty conceived and played with UNRIVALED PRECISION.  it is BRILLIANT.

the three-piece is made up of MC/vocalist RIDE, drummer ZACH HILL and keyboardist/programmer ANDY MORIN.  HILL of course is a PRODIGIOUS, generationally TALENTED musician that came to UNDERGROUND prominence in the PROGRESSIVE MATH ROCK band HELLA.  his METRONOMIC PRECISION on the kit is ABSURD, which is prefect in the context of DEATH GRIPS and their EXTREME DYNAMICS with EVER-SHIFTING AND COMPLEX TIME SIGNATURES and TEMPO SHIFTS designed for the maximum juxtaposition of DISSONANCE and AURAL DISLOCATION.  key tacks included "BEWARE," "CULTURE SHOCK," "GUILLOTINE," "LORD OF THE GAME" and "KNOWN FOR IT."  RIDE comes across as the most INTENSE and PRIMAL of ringleaders of a DEMENTED circus youd never wish to attend, guiding you through a sonic mind-field that is both OVERWHELMING and EXASPERATING in detail and UNRELENTING BRUTALITY alike.  i see his function within the MUSIC as making it feel COHESIVE by providing a FOCAL POINT and an INTENT, even if such is purely CATHARTIC and EMOTIONAL in scope initially.  his VOICE pulls you in and directs you through the CHAOS.

not sure what else to say.  i absolutely adore this band and this mixtape.  an absolutely ESSENTIAL release that is well worth checking out, much like other OPAQUE yet highly IMAGINATIVE and ORIGINAL releases of past decades like NINE INCH NAILS' THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL (INTERSCOPE, 1994), SWANS' CHILDREN OF GOD (CAROLINE, 1987), CAPTAIN BEEFHEART's TROUT MASK REPLICA (STRAIGHT, 1969) or MF DOOM's VAUDVILLE VILLAIN (SOUND-INK, 2003).

POST PUNK and INDUSTRIAL informed act THE SOFT MOON is the brainchild of one LOS ANGELES native LUIS VASQUEZ.  raised by a single mother his upbringing was very much a PERIPATETIC affair throughout CALIFORNIA and 90s PUNK ROCK and 80s HARDCORE very much informed his musical interests.  its intriguing that the LUSH, INTIMATE and ETHEREAL yet BLEAK, IMPOSING and VAST emotional DARK WAVE soundscapes, which bring to mind everyone from DEPECHE MODE, THE FALL, DRAB MAJESTY and KILLING JOKE to BAUHAUS and TWIN TRIBES, are all rooted in one dude.  then again, you get the sense that his upbringing maybe made him more than a little INTROSPECTIVE and SELF-RELIANT.

having led a pretty NOMADIC existence myself for years on end living abroad, i identify with how his albums transition based on his new adopted surroundings in locales such as VENICE, OAKLAND, BERLIN and BROOKLYN among others.  i look forward to seeing what VASQUEZ has cooked up next.  THE SOFT MOON is definitely worth checking out.

i tend to think of the NINE INCH NAILS' BROKEN (INTERSCOPE, 1992) EP as a bit of palette cleanser from the INTIMATE, SELF-FLAGELLATING SYNTH POP-indebted PRETTY HATE MACHINE (TVT, 1989) to the eventual EPIC SELF-DESTRUCTIVE, PHANTASMAGORIC INDUSTRIAL nightmare that was THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL (INTERSCOPE, 1994); two absolutely colossal LANDMARK releases in the history of ROCK AND ROLL, sub-genres be damned.

whereas THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL was a DELICATE web of INSECURITY and RESENTMENT primarily drawn from the vernacular of 1980s synth music subverted not to be CELEBRATORY, but deeply FLAWED and TORN in sentiment.  there are some SAMPLED and INDUSTRIAL elements throughout, but such are more decorative in nature than what was to come on future releases.  with debauched and crushingly aggressive tracks like "HAPPINESS IN SLAVERY," "GAVE UP," "LAST," "HELP ME I AM IN HELL," "PINION" and especially "WISH" BROKEN provides a more metallic edge that seeks to up the ante on sonic SELF-EVISCERATION and aurally emoting the remnants of a BROKEN PSYHE.  BROKEN in essence reads like a PRIMAL SCREAM lashing out not only at the MUSIC INDUSTRY (especially exploitive former label TVT), but the world at large.  it is the most AGGRESSIVE moment in otherwise famously unrelentingly BLEAK discography.

by the time THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL came out, its more SAMPLE HEAVY and INDUSTRIAL-based experiments with DISSONANCE and JAGGED SONIC JUXTAPOSITIONS didnt come off as such a departure, but rather as a refinement of an earlier more blunt ARTISTIC expression encountered on BROKEN.  this EP was something that completely blew me away as a teenager when i first got into NINE INCH NAILS in the late 1990s and seemingly expressed my FRUSTRATION, fears and insecurity like nothing i heard before.  it was MAINLINED AGGRESSION and SELF-HATRED and easily one of the highlights of a CELEBRATED catalogue that continues to evolve, develop and mature to this day at TRENT REZNOR makes his way through life.  BROKEN is one of my all-time FAVORITE records and well worth checking out.

back in the day, ILLINOIS-based INDUSTRIAL-tinged ALTERNATIVE ROCK band STABBING WESTWARD were often unfairly tagged by critics as NINE INCH NAILS soundalikes and essentially OPPORTUNISTIC wannabes.  it makes sense given that INDUSTRIAL MUSIC was largely a MISUNDERSTOOD underground affair until the genius of TRENT REZNOR and NINE INCH NAILS elevated the form from obscurity and found a national audience, especially with the ICONIC release of THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL (INTERSCOPE, 1994).  pre-NINE INCH NAILS, national music critics were largely unfamiliar with or ignored entirely INNOVATIVE acts like SKINNY PUPPY, THROBBING GRISTLE, FRONT 242 or MINISTRY.  so i understand why STABBING WESTWARD took flack for sounding tangentially similar to a major buzz band of the moment when they released their WITHER BLISTER BURN + PEEL (COLUMBIA, 1995) album.

but STABBING WESTWARD is its own thing.  to my ears they have more in common with the ALTERNATIVE ROCK / METAL wing of INDUSTRIAL-influenced music; acts like FILTER, GRAVITY KILLS, RAMMSTEIN and even early MARILYN MANSON who basically utilized SAMPLING and DRUM MACHINES to augment their TRADITIONAL ROCK AND ROLL sound.  NINE INCH NAILS is an entirely different part of that spectrum / continuum having effectively carved out their own respected niche in the process.  the thrill of STABBING WESTWARD is in WELL-CONSTRUCTED singles like "SHAME" and "WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO?" that showcase the CHARGED, EXISTENTIAL howling of CHARISMATIC frontman CHRISTOPHER HALL, who often comes across as someone on the verge of a PSYCHOTIC break from this world.  it is almost operatic in nature given the theatrical dynamics of their approach to songwriting, each song is almost a case study in longing, unrequited LOVE or bitter ENVY.  its always FULL-TILT, TORQUED emotions and the EXISTENTIAL fear of subsuming ones identity to the paralysis of EXPLOSIVE romantic PAIN with STABBING WESTWARD.

or such is how i perceived their appeal when i learned of the group from a classmate and friend in the late 1990s while a sophomore at a boarding school in NEW ENGLAND.  i remember being surrounded by people of INCREDIBLE means and access with their CHARMED lives seemingly on hold for them to finish high school and feeling alienated by it all.  my peer group was on a different level and deep down i just felt like a lost dunce from ORANGE COUNTY who somehow through a break in the time-space continuum found myself attending alongside them.  STABBING WESTWARD and the sound of WITHER BLISTER BURN + PEEL is SOCIAL ISOLATION personified.  it remains an important FORMATIVE record in my life, especially at such PIVOTAL state in my life.  even in retrospect, it is most definitely worth checking out.

HOLY WOOD (IN THE SHADOW OF THE VALLEY OF DEATH) (INTERSCOPE, 2000) was a bit of retread record.  having expanded his INDUSTRIAL-tinged GOTH METAL roots at the zenith of his FAME and CULTURAL CACHE with a left turn to that of CLASSIC 70s GLAM ROCK a la DAVID BOWIE in MECHANICAL ANIMALS (INTERSCOPE, 1998), this follow-up saw MARILYN MANSON return back to the formula that seemingly worked on ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR (INTERSCOPE, 1996) almost four years earlier.  only thing was that the cultural moment HOLY WOOD was released within had transformed the AMERICAN public's view of MANSON.  this is since it was released a year after the COLUMBINE HIGH SCHOOL MASSACRE in COLORADO that saw twelve students and one teacher murdered at the hands of two heavily armed classmates.  it was (falsely) reported in the press at the time that said murderers were fans of MANSON, an INNACURACY that forever transformed his career.

its hard to put COLUMBINE into perspective with our current AWFUL state of affairs where school shootings happen on such a regular basis that it is easy to be OVERWHELMED and HOPELESS about the prospect of change.  the likes of SANDY HOOK ELEMENTARY, VIRGINIA TECH, MARJORY STONEMAN DOUGLASS, UC SANTA BARBARA, SANTA FE, and ROBB ELEMENTARY are just the most prominent of an enduring facet of AMERICAN LIFE: our inability to confront the corrosive widespread availability of high-capacity weapons of war in our society.  in 1999, during the CLINTON administration, COLUMBINE was that initial siren warning us all of this impending danger.  instead of change or legislation, a new IMPOTENT NATIONAL RITUAL was instituted in which HOLLOW PRAYERS were made and nothing happened.  gone on ever since.  back then instead of change we as a country did the easy thing going after cultural targets: i.e. violent movies, video games and, of course, MARILYN MANSON.

for me its hard to read HOLY WOOD disentangled from that cultural moment, as MANSON himself was consumed by it.  his global supporting effort was the "guns, god and government" tour for starters.  he even made a MEMORABLE and THOUGHTFUL cameo in MICHAEL MOORE's BOWLING FOR COLUMBINE (UNITED ARTISTS, 2002) film, itself an examination of AMERICA's fascination with guns, before a DENVER gig.  sonically the record is not that far removed from MECHANICAL ANIMALS in that the songs are pretty streamlined and traditionally structured, unlike previous efforts which were more EXPERIMENTAL INDUSTRIAL art pieces.  lyrically MANSON is trading on his requisite themes of ALIENATION and PSYCHIC / SOCIAL ISOLATION on memorable tracks like "CRUCI-FICTION IN SPACE," "THE FIGHT SONG," "A PLACE IN THE DIRT," "THE NOBODIES," "BURNING FLAG" and "DISPOSABLE TEENS." my personal favorite track is the plodding "CRUCI-FICTION IN SPACE" which has a 40,000 foot elevated perspective on the human race and its follies similar to that of the famous ORSON WELLES / HARRY LIME ferris wheel scene in THE THIRD MAN (BRITISH LION, 1949) were the true value of mankind is discussed and entertained from a distance.  the implication for MANSON seems to be that if these students dont matter in AMERICAN LIFE, than who does?

who does indeed.  HOLY WOOD is still as RELEVANT now as it was more than two decades ago.

by the time i discovered during my senior year of high school the DANCEABLE INDUSTRIAL group MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT through the GREGG ARAKI film NOWHERE (FINE LINE, 1997), my conception INDUSTRIAL MUSIC had expanded beyond the popular ALTERNATIVE band NINE INCH NAILS into something else entirely.  along with the more INTROSPECTIVE and SUBDUED SKINNY PUPPY, the more CONFRONTATIONAL and explicitly METAL-focused KMFDM, as well as the sonic deconstruction-minded originators in THROBBING GRISTLE, INDUSTRIAL MUSIC proved to be a fruitful vehicle for a whole host of artists with varying POLITICAL, ARTISTIC and MUSICAL agendas.

for MY LIFE WITH THE HTRILL KILL KULT, that agenda seemed to be a tongue-firmly-in-cheek rhythmic exercise in RUSS MEYER-themed SEXPLOITATION cinema samples.  such a pleasure agenda is more than apparent on their third release SEXPLOSION! (WAX TRAX!, 1991) with its moans of ECSTASY and SEDUCTIVE purrs.  this record through tracks like "SEX ON WHEELS," "LEATHERSEX," "A MARTINI BUILT FOR 2," "SEXPLOSION," and "THE INTERNATIONAL SIN SET," seems to be a celebration of all things SEX and INSTANT GRATIFICATION.  its compelling to me since my understanding previous to MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT was that INDUSTRIAL MUSIC was in essence the pursuit of a musical lexicon devoid of humanity.  here the same deconstructive elements are used to provide a PHANTASMAGORIC and almost psychotically PSYCHEDELIC experience of SEXUAL GRATIFICATION devoid of an object.  just the aural enjoyment of PLEASURE and ELATION as an INTELLECTUAL CONSTRUCT and organizing principle. 

in other words MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT are thematically concerned with HUMAN CONNECTION, which is counterintuitive and even antithetical to the previous almost NIHILISTIC ethos of INDUSTRIAL MUSIC as i understood it.  my assumption was always that these bands were concerned with exploring the outer reaches of one's social and psychic ISOLATION from society, or even from their own tenuous grip on their own sense of identity.  to construct a sonic aesthetic utilizing unassociated identifiers of PHYSICAL PLEASURE is pretty INGENIOUS and signifies the potential of future HUMAN CONNECTION and even GRATIFICATION from that interaction.  which is a long-winded way of saying that MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT remain such an ICONOCLASTIC band decades on in my opinion.  and SEXPLOSION! is arguably the high-water mark of their career and well worth checking out, regardless of your familiarity or relative interest in INDUSTRIAL MUSIC.  it is that good.

half a decade ago NOISEY had an INCREDIBLE series of interview videos moderated by THE QUIETUS founding editor JOHN DORAN (who also writes for THE GUARDIAN, THEWIRE , VICE and METAL HAMMER and creates programming for the BBC) called THE BRITISH MASTERS that got at the heart of what made a certain cadre of LEGENDARY ENGLISH musicians and songwriters of varying genres so IMPACTFUL and EFFECTIVE.  included in the mix were participants like TRICKY (MASSIVE ATTACK), JOHNNY MARR (THE SMITHS), COSEY FANNI TUTTI (THROBBING GRISTLE), JOHN LYDON (SEX PISTOLS, PUBLIC IMAGE LIMITED), MARK E SMITH (THE FALL), ROOTS MANUVA, PAUL SIMONON (THE CLASH), BRYAN FERRY (ROXY MUSIC), DAMON ALBARN (BLUR, GORILLAZ), NEIL TENNANT (PET SHOP BOYS), VIV ALBERTINE (THE SLITS), GARY NUMAN (TUBEWAY ARMY), LIAM GALLAGHER (OASIS), GOLDIE and BRETT ANDERSON (SUEDE) among others.

my sense is that there is a certain mix of PAROCHIALISM at play in BRITAIN whereby it is SMALL and DISCONNECTED enough from nearby EUROPE to cultivate an INDEPENDENT arts scene without much outside influence.  conversely and completely counterintuitively ENGLAND's recent past as a colonial power allows it to have a DIVERSE cultural population that manifests in organically UNIQUE cultural products that reflect such.  just a look at the guests chosen for this series one is confronted with a myriad of sub-genres including PUNK ROCK, HIP HOP, INDUSTRIAL MUSIC, SYNTH POP, POST PUNK, BRITPOP, DRUM & BASS and TRIP HOP.  each represents a specific community, lifestyle with an attendant set of values that renders all of them uniquely BRITISH.

the cultural references utilized are now a bit dated, but THE BRITISH MASTERS still very much holds up and is well worth investigation.  definitely worth checking out.

i recently came across this rare promotional cassette release by the MULTI-FACETED NYC DANCE-INDUSTRIAL-PUNK-JUNGLE-METAL-ELECTRONIC band MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE that was meant as a bridge between their upcoming FRANKENSTEIN GIRLS WILL SEEM STRANGELY SEXY (ELEKTRA, 2000) album and their previously self-released INDEPENDENT TIGHT (UPPITY CRACKER, 199) release.  as such, the BITCHES (ELEKTRA, 1999) sampler has three songs from each release, namely "BITCHES," "CLARISSA" and "SEVEN ELEVEN" from FRANKENSTEIN GIRLS and "TIGHT," "PUSSY ALL NIGHT" and the METHOD MAN cover "BRING THE PAIN" from TIGHT.

ive never come across any MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE release on cassette out in the wild so this was quite a find (i.e. good luck finding either TIGHT or FRANKENSTEIN GIRLS), so i will use this review as my opportunity to speak on what made the band so SPECIAL on those early pair of releases.  my introduction was the band's debut TIGHT that i was exposed to shortly after moving to KUWAIT my junior year of high school via an AMERICAN classmate who had seen them open the previous summer for SOULFLY.  a tape of his copy made its way around to everyone in my circle of friends and that winter my family took a trip to GREECE where i found the follow-up FRANKENSTEIN GIRLS at a record store in ATHENS.  also on that trip my record haul included the first few DEVO albums just to give you an idea of where my head was at during that period.  once relocating to NEW JERSEY in the early 2000s, my brother and i saw MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE somewhere around twenty times in and around the tri-state area over a three-to-four year period.  they were like our GRATEFUL DEAD of sorts.

basically MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE sounded like nobody else sonically or lyrically.  their music would seemingly spontaneously shift dramatically in start stop spurts and trigger SAMPLES, BLAST BEATS, ARPEGGIATED KEYBOARD RUNS, FUNKY BASS LINES, etc.  it was music for the ADD set and those with absolutely no attention span as the hooks would just keep coming nonstop.  lyrically singer and main songwriter JIMMY URINE painted a world that enveloped everything from NERD CULTURE (i.e. COMICS, DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS, VIDEO GAMES) to GANGSTER RAP to BLACK METAL and everything in between.  his persona was one of arch MOCKERY at all forms of authority, concepts of COOLNESS or INDUSTRY GATEKEEPING.  he represented very much an UNDEGROUND of DISAFFECTED and UNAPPRECIATED masses and chances are if you were unable to appreciate his HUMOR, then it was likely pointed at you in the first place.  enter FRED DURST who wanted to sign them to FLIP RECORDS way back in the day and at a LOS ANGELES showcase performance in front of record executives the band did a rendition of "I HATE JIMMY PAGE" that instead became "I HATE FRED DURST."  point taken.

its not that the band didnt have its supporters.  their sound was so uniquely UNPREDICTABLE and REVOLUTIONARY that, in my opinion at the time, made everyone else sound conventional by comparison.  this during the height of NU METAL with its emphasis on HYBRID sonic TEXTURES and supposed EXPERIMENTATION.  thus despite never enjoying a hit record to their name, MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE were championed by a diverse set of peers over the years, some they collaborated with and others repeatedly toured with, including everyone from LINKIN PARK, SYSTEM OF A DOWN, LORDS OF ACID, TAKING BACK SUNDAY and MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE to THE DRESDEN DOLLS, COMBICHRIST, KORN, THE BIRTHDAY MASSACRE and EINSTURZENDE NEUBAUTENEN among many others. 

because their sound was so MULTI-FACETED it in essence became GENRE-LESS (which still seems to the modern definition by today's standards more than two decades later), it seems such was their downfall commercially.  they didnt fit neatly anywhere on the highly formatted radio playlists, irrespective of the push by a major label or highly successful peers.  subsequent releases seemed to be either attempts at pairing back and streamlining the formula, ie. YOU WILL REBEL TO ANYTHING (METROPOLIS, 2005) and IF (THE END, 2008), or revisiting and full-tilt revitalizing it, i.e. HOW I LEARNED TO STOP GIVING A SHIT AND LOVE MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE (UPPITY CRACKER, 2013). 

its a shame that such an EXHAUSTIVELY CREATIVE band never got their commercial due by a lame public that didnt understand them.  what makes matters worse is that URINE is still in the midst of lawsuit regarding the sexual assault of a minor back in the late 1990s.  as a fan its impossible to know what to believe.  obviously if such accusations are true then URINE deserves his reputation to be sullied and his sentence appropriate to the crime.  but its been a waiting game for a few years now as such plays out in court and its hard to know whats north or south on the subject.

but, yeah back in the day MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE was it.  a truly INNOVATIVE band that have only come tom arguably sound more RELEVANT today than back in their heyday.

its readily apparent that INDUSTRIAL METAL pioneers FEAR FACTORY were on a creative roll when they created OBSOLETE (ROADRUNNER, 1998) in the late 1990s.  they always had next-level CRUSHING METAL staccato riffage a la DINO CAZARES as well as VOIVOD-inspired lyrical fever dreams of a FUTURE DYSTOPIAN STATE controlled by ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE through the creative mind of singer BURTON C. BELL, especially on the much CELEBRATED previous DEMANUFACTURE (ROADRUNNER, 1995) album.  but OBSOLETE took these sci-fi themes and punishing sonic BRUTALITY, not to mention the songwriting, to an entirely new plateau on tracks like "EDGECRUSHER," "FREEDOM OR FIRE," "SMASHER / DEVOURER," "HI-TECH HATE" and most memorably throughout the EPIC centerpiece "RESURRECTION."  this was music believably written by a FUTURE SINGULAR CONSCIOUSNESS somewhere between MAN and ROBOTS lamenting the loss of HUMANITY.  there is a leve of thematic and musical COHESION on this record that arguably was never matched again in their discography, despite other SEMINAL efforts like their follow-up release DIGIMORTAL (ROADRUNNER, 2001).

i came to be aware of FEAR FACTORY when i saw their BLISTERING set at OZZFEST 99 in support of OBSOLETE from the previous year.  what caught my attention was the RIDICULOUS precision of their live set.  this was the era of NU-METAL and guitars that were positioned in the frequency range of basses and employed simple guitar riffs that were meant to establish a GROOVE.  the result was a muddled sonic affair.  in contrast, FEAR FACTORY was almost a throwback in terms of aural heroics to the right-hand PERCUSSIVE tightness and GALLOPING, rhythmic dexterity of RENOWNED THRASH guitarists like JAMES HETFIELD (METALLICA), SCOTT IAN (ANTHRAX) and JEFF HANNEMAN (SLAYER).  CAZARES takes that level of precision and melds it with PROGRESSIVE INDUSTRIAL elements that opens a new world of staccato rhythms and counterintuitively, deep GROOVE.  to my ears it outdid similar achievements by the likes of MINISTRY or MACHINE HEAD.  i was a fan on the spot.

its funny that with the currently rolled out advancements in online ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE chatbots like CHATGPT and GOOGLE BARD,  that this PHILIP K. DICK / ISAAC ASIMOV / WILLIAM GIBSON / ARTHUR C. CLARKE / H. G. WELLS future is seemingly at our doorstep and the themes of FEAR FACTORY and OBSOLETE in particular are as RELEVANT as ever.  makes me wonder what an actual METAL album by a COMPUTER would sound like.  i highly doubt itd be as unrelentingly BRUTAL or creatively COHESIVE as OBSOLETE. 

​but who really knows?

in less than two short years itll be three decades since my family permanently left SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA for whats been an INSANE journey that has led me to live in several countries across five continents before resettling on the east coast of the UNITED STATES in recent years.  ive been back out west a few times, enough to know that whatever ties i had to ORANGE COUNTY and the greater LOS ANGELES area are now pretty DISTANT and MINUSCULE, but one thing i still hold on to is the EXPERIENCE of listening to the radio while in early elementary school.  specifically the nationally INFLUENTIAL ALTERNATIVE ROCK powerhouse that is 106.7FM KROQ.

i have a DISTINCT MEMORY of listening to KROQ and hearing bands like SOUNDGARDEN, LIVING COLOUR, MORRISSEY, THE B-52's, PEARL JAM, JANE'S ADDICTION, U2, TEARS FOR FEARS, NIRVANA, THE CURE, STONE TEMPLE PILOTS, ELECTRONIC, 4 NON BLONDES, DURAN DURAN, R.E.M. and ALICE IN CHAINS on car trips to and from school and regional sporting events with my dad as a kid.  at this point that MEMORY is like a security blanket and one reason i probably view radio as an almost SACROSANCT institution.

embedded below are live performances of bands that have played the WEENIE ROAST, ALMOST ACOUSTIC CHRISTMAS or their recent SOUND SPACE events.  all of it was recorded well after my time in LOS ANGELES but squarely showcases the continued influence of that station.  it is all definitely worth checking out.

when i discovered MARILYN MANSON and the ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR (review linked HERE) album in seventh grade, it felt at the time like the perfect expression of my tortured teenage existence living amongst a bunch of AMERICAN SOUTHERNERS abroad in NIGERIA.  that record showcased a distilled and unadulterated NIHILISTIC viewpoint that was CAUSTIC as much as it was RIGHTEOUS about the HYPOCRISY of the AMERICAN way of life and its DUPLICITY regarding matters of RELIGION, SEX and POLITICS.  MANSON had his finger on a pulse that i would come to understand all too well living abroad and the returning stateside yearly to hear about DILUTED, PHONY and downright QUIXOTIC notions of AMERICAN EXCEPTIONALISM and our supposed CULTURAL and MORAL DOMINANCE on GLOBAL AFFAIRS.  it remains to date an IMPORTANT and CONSEQUENTIAL album for me.

​funny enough, i cam across the debut PORTRAIT OF AN AMERICAN FAMILY (NOTHING, 1994) album a few months later while in FLORIDA (MARILYN MANSON was formed in FORT LAUDERDALE) of all places on a school trip centered around marine biology.  it was a completely INCONGROUS experience listening to the EXTREME imagery and NIHILISTIC takedown of AMERICAN LIFE in tracks like "GET YOUR GUNN," "LUNCHBOX," "DOPE HAT" and "CAKE AND SODOMY" while in a scenic science camp in the FLORIDA KEYS, but that was how it went down.   

i remember noticing immediately how sonically and lyrically PORTRAIT OF AN AMERICAN FAMILY felt more CARTOONISH, less polished and more ABRASIVE than ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR (both produced by TRENT REZNOR of NINE INCH NAILS fame).  arguably this record is the CREATIVE high point of founding guitarist DAISY BERKOWITZ, whose slinky and economic riffage are a signature of this era of the band, more angular POST PUNK than grooved-out METAL that the band would later evolve into on subsequent releases.  bassist TWIGGY RAMIREZ serves as a fitting counterpoint to BERKOWITZ with his propulsive sense of groove that is further reinforced by drummer GINGER FISH's off-kilter sense of meter.  lastly keyboardist MADONNA WAYNE GACY is in SINGULAR form on this album, with probably more freedom on record than anytime since, as he introduces INDUSTRIAL-inflected haunting loops and vintage horror film samples that basically established the shtick for countless bands since (i'm looking right at you INSANE CLOWN POSSE).

you can see the potential the band had with PORTRAIT OF AN AMERICAN FAMILY, which feels like a less conceptually fleshed out and sonically more SPARE version of the later ANTICHRIST SUPERSTAR.  in my mind those releases are spiritually and thematically connected.  as a teenager both of these records were completely EMPOWERING and served as a springboard into discovering other like-minded INDUSTRIAL acts in high school such as FRONT 242, THROBBING GRISTLE, MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT, SKINNY PUPPY, FRONT LINE ASSEMBLY, MINISTRY, ATARI TEENAGE RIOT, GODFLESH, CABARET VOLTAIRE, VNV NATION and KMFDM among others.  PORTRAIT OF AN AMERICAN FAMILY is not an INDUSTRIAL record per se, but it utilizes aspects of its sound to showcase a vision of an AMERICAN CULTURE in decline by the weight of its own ARROGANCE.  its almost like it foresaw the TRUMP ADMINISTRATION a decade and a half in advance.

of course i have to mention that the DISTURBING sexual predatory allegations against MARILYN MANSON the individual (as well as TWIGGY RAMIREZ) have been very DISAPPOINTING and DISILLUSIONING.  MARILYN MANSON felt like an avatar for the collective id of UNBRIDLED teenage ALIENATION and INSECURITY.  it felt like he was authentically channeling something DEEP and possibly TRAUMATIC through his ART, which despite its NIHILISTIC and BITING delivery was nothing if not POSITIVE and AMELIORATIVE on balance.  the fact that he could have deliberately hurt so many women through his elevated status due to his ART is beyond UNCONSCIONABLE. 

​and SAD.  and i stand with his victims.  i hope he gets whats coming to him.

parodies by nacrowe

it seems every time i become completely jaded by music i reach for INDUSTRIAL bands like THROBBING GRISTLE, FRONT 242, EINSTURZENDE NEUBAUTEN, SISTER MACHINE GUN, CABARET VOLTAIRE,  FRONT LINE ASSEMBLY or SKINNY PUPPY to essentially reset my expectations anew.  there is just something so invigorating about music that discards convention and attempts to remove the HUMAN ELEMENT entirely, creating ideally something MECHANICAL and devoid of nuance and sensitivity.  of course, even in that INTRIGUING pursuit those human embellishments still find their way into the composition, but the attempt in and of itself is LIBERATING.

i definitely got drawn into this genre via the INDUSTRIAL METAL variant that became popular in the 1990s thanks to bands like MINISTRY, FEAR FACTORY, KMFDM, RAMMSTEIN and of course NINE INCH NAILS.  i think there is something about the booming DISSONANT NOISE of METAL guitars that blends seamlessly into the highly SYNCOPATED RHYTHMIC PATTERNS of INDUSTRIAL MUSIC that just makes the HYBRID SOUND an INTOXICATING and OVERWHELMING LISTENING EXPERIENCE.  it can also be DANCEABLE which is awkward territory for METAL in general, but oddly it works.

like any genre, things do become STALE over time and GENRE CONVENTIONS calcify into GENRE ORTHODOXY, both on the part of the players and the audience, but one band that continues to take chances both in terms of TONE and PRESENTATION is MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT.  their whole DEBAUCHED, SEXUALLY-LIBERATED vibe definitely utilized the ROTE stability of the RHYTHMS into something else entirely: a FREAK, idealized future vision of a world devoid of government world orders and corporate overlords that allowed for individuals to effectively pursue pleasure unencumbered by OPPRESSIVE social structures and religious institutions. an EDEN in essence. the ROBOTIC nature of the music is somehow inverted to be something inarguably LIBERATING and REVOLUTIONARY.  MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT is easily on of my favorites of the genre.

embedded below is a DEER GOD RADIO episode from 2020 (just before the pandemic) on nonprofit internet radio station MAKERPARKRADIO.NYC dedicated to various INDUSTRIAL bands.  enjoy!

parodies by nacrowe

check out HERE this recent streaming video episode of DEER GOD RADIO celebrating the influential BRITISH INDEPENDENT RECORD LABEL  MUTE RECORDS which helped spearhead SYNTH POP, POST PUNK and INDUSTRIAL MUSIC!
​
​​past episodes of DEER GOD RADIO are available here at the DEER GOD website as well as in the MAKERPARKRADIO.NYC archives.

and if you haven't done so already get the FREE PHONE APP for IOS/ANDROID and enjoy listening to MAKERPARKRADIO.NYC 24/7 at your convenience!

much as NINE INCH NAILS is for all intents and purposes a solo project spearheaded by TRENT REZNOR, FILTER likewise is such for RICHARD PATRICK (although initially cofounder BRIAN LIESEGANG had a more prominent role).  in fact, before starting his band PATRICK served as a touring guitarist with NINE INCH NAILS.  his departure was in part financial, as he clarifies in the recent documentary HIRED GUN (DRAMA KILLS, 2017) the extent to which being a touring musician left him out of songwriting or publishing royalties.  with encouragement from REZNOR he formed FILTER.

i say all this because it is very difficult to listen to the INDUSTRIAL-influenced METAL / ALTERNATIVE ROCK of the FILTER's debut album SHORT BUS (REPRISE, 1995) and not hear echoes of his former band.  the EXTREME dynamics at play with the production and song construction showcases a formula that oscillated between MINIMAL, MOODY, drum-programmed verses and massive, DISSONANT choruses with PATRICK's BLOOD-CURDLING screams taking center stage.  on songs like "DOSE," "UNDER" and especially "HEY MAN, NICE SHOT" PATRICK's voice is very much the main attraction.  he seemingly has this intriguing ability when singing to project multiple notes in a similar manner to other noteworthy singers like CHESTER BENNINGTON and AXL ROSE.  tonally its very unique and is a signature of FILTER's sound both on their debut and subsequent releases (which cleverly focus on songwriting that promotes his unique range sans the CHAOTIC dissonance of their debut).

the center-piece of the album is the opener "HEY MAN, NICE SHOT" which had the unfortunate happenstance of having been written before but being released after KURT COBAIN's shocking suicide by firearm.  the song was inspired by the notorious UNDERGROUND footage of the R BUDD DWYER suicide on live television.  DWYER being a PENNSYLVANIA politician who was convicted on corruption charges and killed himself by hand gun at a public press conference.  the narrator of the song almost identifies with the subject for his decision, celebrating the act as a form of rebellion and act of resurrecting one's sense of personal IDENTITY and INDEPENDENCE.  its a very dark song, but its brutal taboo subject mattered coupled with its EXTREME dynamics made it an ALTERNATIVE ROCK radio hit in the mid 1990s.  i distinctly remember hearing the song on 106.7FM KROQ LOS ANGELES when i was in elementary school.  at the time i didnt make the connection to COBAIN although i was still quite young at the time.

in retrospect whats compelling about SHORT BUS is how its formula was largely abandoned on subsequent releases that had little to no INDUSTRIAL flourishes and more LUSH and ORCHESTRATED arrangements that seemed focuses on elevating PATRICK's voice rather than burying it in DISSONANT noise.  personally, i feel strongly that FILTER songs from this period have more TENSION and AGGRESSION partly due to the fact that his voice is fighting for prominence in the mix.  the songwriting definitely improved on TITLE OF RECORD (REPRISE, 1999) and THE AMALGAMUT (REPRISE, 1999), as well as the much later THE TROUBLE WITH ANGELS (NUCLEAR BLAST, 2010), but there is something about the PRIMAL screaming on SHORT BUS that is much more MEMORABLE than those later records.  they all seem to be playing by the ALTERNATIVE ROCK playbook while SHORT BUS felt like an intriguing side-street from the main thoroughfare that was NINE INCH NAILS' PRETTY HATE MACHINE (TVT, 1989) and THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL (NOTHING, 1994) from that period.

at lest that is how i remember it.  SHORT BUS is an INCREDIBLE record and well worth checking out.